ST!#CH OUT LOUD
Sending awesomeness and obscenities into the world one stitch at a time.
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
To whom it may concern:
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
For those times when one profanity just isn't enough
Monday, August 9, 2010
Not all that bad
When work is crazy, when I get down on myself about any one of my numerous vices, or when everything seems just a little too overwhelming. Where do I go when a need a happy place?
I like to sit back, take a deep breathe, and realize that life could be a whole lot different. Then I smile, and wave down the server for another extra dirty martini.
I like to sit back, take a deep breathe, and realize that life could be a whole lot different. Then I smile, and wave down the server for another extra dirty martini.
Labels:
cross stitch,
needlecraft,
stitch out loud,
stripping,
vices
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
Newton's 3rd Law
Growing up we had a strict no swearing policy in the Apitz house. The kibosh was quickly put on anything and everything that even hinted at profanity.
To my mom, who I love dearly, I say A for effort. Every time I stitch the f-bomb in cross stitch I think of you, and how proud you must be of me.
XOXO,
Your Angelic Daughter Shanna
Labels:
daughter,
mom,
motherfucker,
potty mouth,
profanity,
swear
Sunday, January 24, 2010
The meaning of love
I thought I would give the Stitch Out Loud masses a little warm up to the quickly approaching Valentine's Day. And what's more inspiring in the realm of lovey-dovey-ness than the 1970 classic Love Story?
Even if you are not familiar with the movie, the plot or the actors, or simply weren't alive when this movie was released - you without a doubt are familiar with the famous quote:
"Love means never having to say you're sorry."
Little did you know this quote came out of editing. Below I submit to you the originally scripted line, recorded forever in cross stitch awesomeness.
Labels:
cross stitch,
love,
love story,
make out,
naughty,
valentine's day
Friday, January 22, 2010
My favorite Disney movie
A kick ass coworker of mine, Rich, and I were discussing Disney movies the other day over lunch. (Feel free to laugh and make fun of me here....Lord knows I would). Anyways - Mary Poppins quickly rose to the top as both of our favs.
So...in dedication I submit to you the following. Appropriate for any occasion. (As long as that occasion does not include little kids, great grandparents or crotchety stuffy anti-profanity zealots.)
Friday, December 11, 2009
Rain drops on roses and whiskers on kittens...
...these are a few of my favorite things.
Okay, okay. Vices. Whatevs. Ta-mato, toe-mato.
Bottom line: I have more vices than I can shake a stick at. But here are some of my favs. Naturally...I thought this piece worthy of a Friday post.
Okay, okay. Vices. Whatevs. Ta-mato, toe-mato.
Bottom line: I have more vices than I can shake a stick at. But here are some of my favs. Naturally...I thought this piece worthy of a Friday post.
Labels:
Booze,
boys,
cigarettes,
cross stitch,
favorite things,
shoes,
sound of music,
vices
Monday, November 23, 2009
For those of you celebrating the birth of Christ this year...
I would love to make one of these as a pre-Christmas gift for for my mom and dad. But then I realized as soon as I were to present them with said gift - they would provide me me a polite courtesy chuckle, an "oh Shanna," then quickly hide it, ensuring that friend nor family could see the profane and lewd work of their daughter.
Maybe next year.
Friday, November 20, 2009
Ho, Ho, Hoe
What's not to love about a big tall dude that travels the world and give you lots of presents?
Available soon at my Etsy shop!
Available soon at my Etsy shop!
Labels:
christmas,
cross stitch,
hoe,
holiday,
needlecraft,
santa
Thursday, November 19, 2009
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
It's the most wonderful time of the year.
That's right...the holiday season rapidly approaches. I have to confess that I'm a total sucker for holiday ambiance so stitched up a couple goodies.
Here's the first for your viewing pleasure:
More to come over the next few days. Cheers!
Here's the first for your viewing pleasure:
More to come over the next few days. Cheers!
Labels:
crackhead,
cross stitch,
gift,
holiday,
prostitute,
snow
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
The Hearting Things Series - #2
As a wise man once said...
You should probably buy this for someone for the upcoming holidays. Just saying.
You should probably buy this for someone for the upcoming holidays. Just saying.
Labels:
craft,
cross stitch,
cross stitch out loud,
herpes,
love,
needlecraft,
pop art
Thursday, November 5, 2009
The Hearting Things Series - #1
Last week a girlfriend of mine asked me if I could help her out with a wedding present. After accepting the "challenge," I thought, hmmm....what will truly capture the magic of marriage, and who can I look to that really kicks ass in matters of the heart? Then it hit me like a ton of bricks - duh, Gob Bluth!
So I borrowed one of my fav Arrested Development moments - and this little gem of a wedding gift was born!
Gob: My God, what is this feeling?
Michael: Well, you know the-the feeling that you’re... that you’re feeling is-is what many of us call “a feeling.”
Gob: But it’s not like envy, or even hungry.
Michael: Could it be love?
Gob: I know what an erection feels like, Michael. No, it’s the opposite. It’s... it’s like my heart is getting hard.
So I borrowed one of my fav Arrested Development moments - and this little gem of a wedding gift was born!
Gob: My God, what is this feeling?
Michael: Well, you know the-the feeling that you’re... that you’re feeling is-is what many of us call “a feeling.”
Gob: But it’s not like envy, or even hungry.
Michael: Could it be love?
Gob: I know what an erection feels like, Michael. No, it’s the opposite. It’s... it’s like my heart is getting hard.
Labels:
arrested development,
cross stitch,
erection,
gob bluth,
heart,
love,
wedding gift
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Even Bad Asses Love Stitch Out Loud
As you can see even studly, bad-to-the-bone(rs) like Mr. Fuji need some Stitch Out Loud awesomeness.
This is a picture from a customer of mine. It cracks me up. What else could a pet frog need in his life but a volcano-like water bowl, some mulchy looking stuff, a few flies, a tropical plant, and of course a "Fuck that shit." cross stitch.
Yes.
Thanks C.
This is a picture from a customer of mine. It cracks me up. What else could a pet frog need in his life but a volcano-like water bowl, some mulchy looking stuff, a few flies, a tropical plant, and of course a "Fuck that shit." cross stitch.
Yes.
Thanks C.
Labels:
cross stitch,
frog,
fuck,
mr. fuji,
pet,
stitch out loud
Friday, September 25, 2009
The Multifunctional Comeback
Labels:
comeback,
cross stitch,
cross stitch out loud,
needlecraft,
pop culture,
your mom
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